Well the Easter Hols have started, and so here I am struggling to not let the "I should be's" get me.

As a business woman I love the way that with my chosen profession I can work the hours I want around my family, because ultimately I love being a Mum and I love being with and playing with my children. As I always say there is such a short time in their lives that they are little and that they actually WANT to be with me and I want to take advantage of every moment of that.

So in the school Hols I do my best to keep my diary free, when I do work I work iin the evening when they are in bed, or hubby can do playtime, or arrange a play date with grandad and nana, and thanks to the E world I can always find an hour to keep in touch with my business world.

Lets face it children dont notice you exist when they are in front of a Wii!

So this is all great for my children but the flip side is the worry about the effect this is having on my business. "I should be doing this" "I should be doing that" Can I really get away with not working everyday for two weeks and still have the successful business I want?

But who does that attitude help? It certainly does nothing for my mindset.The fact is that I am a good business woman, I am achieving what I want to, so I hold on to this knowledge. And do you know what? Building sandcastles and eating chips on the beach feels all the better for knowing that I can have the business I want and the fun I want with my children.

So when the "I should's" hit over the next two weeks I will smile knowing that everything is just fine.

I'd love to know how do you balance life, maybe not with children, but maybe with partners, hobbies, friends, or fitness. What ever it is do you always have the balance you would like? and how do you achieve it?Please share your ideas for a happy balanced successful life?I look forward to sharing with you via Twitter of Facebook.

Wishing you all a Happy Easter what ever you are doing.

Best Wishes,Mandie

Ive got what I wanted

For those that know me I have had a scary few weeks. 2 weeks ago I was rushed to hospital unable to breathe suffering from severe chest pain. Everyone (including me) thought heart attack, which is near on impossible, I am healthy, fit and have never even tried a cigarette so it was unlikely, but E.C.Gs and chest x-rays ensured. 2 Weeks later I am no better, and thanks to the interesting breathing I feel like I am about to pass out all the time.

The answer? The doctor signed me off for 2 weeks and gave me scary float off to the ceiling tablets, which I wont take.

Well we are one week exactly into this "rest, put your feet up and enjoy doing nothing" fortnight, and I am NOT enjoying it.

I love walking through the park and running with my children, I like a tidy home, I like an empty wash basket and I love my job. Its a great job I spend hours talking to people helping them appreciate their strengths and understand and tackle their weaknesses. To watch people achieve things they always thought were unattainable is a great way to spend your time and I am so missing it.

This got me thinking (as I often do) about what we really want. Life has been so hectic recently with the launch of The Business Woman's Network, writing for magazines, seminars, workshops, Coaching and not forgetting my wonderful children and hubby, I have on the odd occasion listened to the sound of the alarm and thought "wouldn't it be nice to just ignore that and lay here all day" Well to the Mandie of 2 weeks ago "NO it would not be nice to lay here!"

If one good thing comes out of feeling this yuck I know that it is an even bigger appreciation of my life. I rarely go a day where I do not look at my children or hug my hubby and not think "aren't I lucky" but now I can really appreciate everything.

I have my goals laid out for where I am taking my business and the business ventures that I am involved in, but I now appreciate that although I have not reached these yet I am enjoying the journey.

It made me think. How often are we looking into the distance at what we want to achieve, own or create that maybe we don't take the time to notice what we already have achieved, what we already have and do bring into this world and the peoples lives that surround us?

So today stop for a

moment and think, "What do I appreciate?" Its great to have goals and ambitions but if you are constantly looking over the horizon will you end up treading on and damaging what you already have?

So as I sit here in bed and think "Oh no, another week yet and no sign of improvement" I am also thinking.

What a great life I lead, and what a great opportunity to stand back and appreciate what is already around me. But don't worry I can still clearly see the horizon and I know its as bright and sunny as the here and now.

If only we could see it.

The other day I was chatting with friends and one of my friends commented on how trendy I was looking today, admittedly I was feeling great, wearing a new short skirt and a cute designer jacket and leather boots, but her comment about me having great legs was completely ignored by me. My reply was "I think you have great legs and I would love to have hair as gorgeous as yours."

Why had I not heard her compliment? which led me to wonder "Did she hear mine about her?" I bet she didn't, and if she did she didn't believe it. I was even able to give her an example of the cute dress and leggings she had had on the previous week, but I bet she dismissed my compliment as quickly as I dismissed hers. Why is this?

Okay so there are people who say things that they think people want to hear for various reasons, to be liked, to get on the persons good side etc But for most of the time most of us, give a compliment because we notice something nice and want to say it. Its that simple. If I see someone carrying a gorgeous bag - I will tell her (and secretly imagine it on my arm!) because its nice for someone to compliment us isn't it?

If it is why do we ignore them so often?

Women especially seem to only notice their bad points, instead of rose tinted glasses we seem to have the opposite - What would they be I wonder? manure coloured perhaps?

This led me to wondering, women are affected by so many external influences, what the celebs are wearing, what the mags say IS fashionable, What the shops tells us we SHOULD be wearing. I wonder do these external influences undermine our ability to trust our own judgment on things? Do these restrict us from believing that we too are beautiful because we don't conform to a magazine cover?

So here's an idea - What would happen if we all believed all the compliments we are given from now on. I wonder how long before we would be less critical of our lumpy bits when we look in the mirror, and maybe we might even start to notice the shining luscious hair and radiant smile first instead of the cellulite under the bingo wings.

I for one am going to give it a try. Hey here's another thought - would the criticism from the outside world feel so detrimental to our well being if we have raised the level of our own belief about ourselves?

If you are going to give this a go, I will give you a piece of advice that I learnt from a very wonderful, inspiration and successful woman. if you cant accept the compliment with the simple word "Thank you" just say nothing at all.

So what do you say?

Give it a go - Hear every compliment from this moment on, and learn to shine from the inside out. If you shine enough you wont even be able to see the cellulite through all that light!

Id love to hear how this goes for you - and I will let you know how I get on too.

Have fun shining!

Melons are parts of a woman's body?

"Tesco, the UK supermarket, couldn’t sell big, fleshy melons. Research by a psychologist suggested that women were subconsciously comparing them with their breasts. So Tesco’s growers have been asked for melons no more than 1lb 3oz in weight, which equates to a C cup (Daily Telegraph 1999)"

I saw this and it made me wonder?

When we go shopping what else have supermarkets, consumer groups and psychologists decided we need to see, hear and feel when we go shopping? and taking that one step further where else are these studies put into practice?

Its not me worrying about a big brother environment, more the case if I knew about the outcome of these studies could I control my shopping patterns, my moods or my ability to return from a shopping trip not feeling like a fat heifer because I am not a size 6?

Wouldn't it be great if you could always return from a shopping trip regardless of how many gorgeous bags you are carrying and feel great?

But then I just remembered I have that ability. Its just a case of whether I decide to put it into practice or not.

I am currently looking for a gorgeous suit - But as yet its not materialised, but despite 3 unsuccessful shopping trips. I am not remotely dejected. Firstly I have enjoyed a stroll around the shops, secondly I have managed 2 meals out, thirdly a couple of gorgeous dresses have been bought, fourthly I bumped into some friends and enjoyed impromptu coffee, and lastly but most importantly a big trip to Lakeside beckons!

If I get no suit will I get dejected? No - and do you know why?
There is always a reason to why things happen, it would just mean my dream suit is not at lake side. Coaching has taught me that there is always another answer I just don't know it yet, and I really enjoy trying new options and getting what I want. So where ever you are dynamic outfit I will find you.

And how this relates to melons? Well the next time I am in the shops I will be wondering what subliminal messages are being sent my way?

S.A.D
What does that stand for again? Oh yes Seasonal affected disorder isint it? I reackon it could also be sad and depressed or so against dark days. Do you note from my tone my lack of normal enthusiasm and energy? Well there are few reasons for this.

Firstly Hubby has flown back off to the other side of the world - a girl could get a complex about that you know!

Secondly we have had another day of freezing temperatures and the heating on so high the boiler is demanding rights to 4 weeks holiday and sick pay. When the weather is like this ( and now we are sat in a snow blizzard!) I just want to curl up in bed with laptop and book any holiday out of here. I would even consider a larger and chips spain holiday if it included sun and warmth.

I am not the kind of person that thinks there is no such thing as bad weather just bad clothing I am the kind of person who never wants to wear a cagool or wellies and would happily burn thermals too. I like the sun, strolling along the beach and building sand castles with the kids.

Making snowmen would be fine if it was only 30 degrees warmer!

My son doesnt get my hate of the snow. I sometimes question my lack of britishness with regards to the white stuff. May be it comes from 9 years of working in the car trade and knowing how badly cars stay on the road up the right way. Maybe its because I fell over when I was 20 and spent the next 3 months laying on my back, or perhaphs it comes from boating with icles hanging off of the handrails or maybe its because its too just too cold and wet for my liking.
What ever the reason, for about half a milli second I think "mmmm that looks pretty" and the rest of the time I am thinking "er cold" It brings my mood down to miserable faster than two kids can when they walk in the house from school and trash the place in 3 seconds. "What house work"

Oh well I have had my moan, I will concentrate on the fact that I have daffodils in a vase in the front room, and when walking the dog yesterday I noticed tiny buds sprouting up and baby shoots poking their heads out of the ground. Now they must know something I dont, so spring MUST be on the way - So perhaps S.A.D could stand for Spring against Depression. I like it. Sunshine, beaches and barbies are nearer than they felt an hour ago, Snow what snow - Its barmy tropical evening here in the holgate home.

Hey I think I am getting some of my normal energy and enthusiasm coming back. A bath and a battle on the wii could be due. "Harry, Sophie Mummy is going to whip your butts at Raymans Ravin Rabbids dance game again!"...

Daddy returns to civilisation - Well the Holgates home version of it!

Well Daddy has been away and has been much missed by me and the kids, but now he briefly returns from his far flung adventures. I some times wonder who has the better side of the deal? Poor old Andy is stuck in Business class sipping G & T's watching the latest movies for 17 hours, then stays in a 5 star hotel.Okay admittedly in between the fantastic food, the gym and lounging by the pool there IS some working in an oil refinery, usually after a back breaking 2 hour ride across desert, but I still wonder if it would make a nice change for me? I am soo bored rigid of the bitterly cold winter and feeling trapped indoors. Maybe next time I could go and get hot, have my bed made and my room tidied for me and enjoy gourmet delights for a while and he can do the school run, wonder how the kids have eaten all the food AGAIN, and tackle the equivalent of the forth bridge of washing and ironing.

Its great when he comes home. Its like we are newly married all kisses and gropes. We really appreciate each other again. Maybe all couples should try it? All his little annoying habits don't seem so bad because you are reminded of all the cute things that make him so special and gorgeous.

Andy has this funny way of twisting words around and making sweet words out of them. For instance Kids he calls childronicles - Cute or stupid? you decide. He makes us babychinnos and in the froth on the top, he sprinkles chocolate in the shape of our initials. For weeks he hid the plastic lid that he had painstakingly cut out our letters on. And told us it was magic. Its nice when I stand in front of him and wibble my baby flabby pouch and he says "Yes but that's you isn't it? Our children came out of there, its part of you and that's how it should be" Bless him, no need to kill myself with Davina's fitness video then.

And that's far nicer to think about than "Am I the only person that can carry the stuff at the bottom of the stairs up them?" Or Does he not know that socks don't walk from the bedroom floor into the wash cupboard?? No really don't worry I'll turn the 300 lights off that you have left on in your wake.

So I am enjoying him home. When hes away I am a clean freak. Last week I hoovered on a Sunday surely there should be some law against that. Where as a week later. Hubby lets me lay in till 9! and insists we lazily slommock and chill with the heating on full blast. Don't ya just love him?

Yes knickers are a requirement every day Sophie.

Funny thing about my daughter. She is so into glittery things, pink, clothes and High School Musical. Already at 5 she knows what she wants to wear and how she wants to wear it. And in all honesty she is very good at co-ordinating her wardrobe. However you can imagine the "fun" that that can cause a Mum.

But she has only just grasped that underwear is most defintely required on a daily basis.

On the day that the picture on the podium was taken. We had arrived and it was only as she went to jump on the bouncy castle that I noticed a cute little bum sticking out. I had laid her clothes out on the bed, I had even been back and checked that everything was on round the right way, etc.

When I asked her why she replied. "I didnt want to wear any knickers" Thank fully on this occasion I had spare jeans in the car. I am not always that lucky. Last year at a bbq I had to borrow my son's boxers (he was not impressed!) for her to wear under her pretty party frock.

This is not a habit that she has got from me. But I may start checking my hubby is wearing underwear.