What Are You Assuming & Missing Out on?

I have met some wonderful people this week at various events. But the more I talked to people the more I was able to appreciate something that seems to be inherent in far too many of us.

Why is it that we assume that what we can do (and are very good at) everyone else can do, But what we can't do everyone else can?

If you think about this. This constantly puts the rest of the universe in a better position than yourself, an odd place to choose to place yourself don't you think? Because I certainly would not want this for any of my friends, family, business associates or clients - so why have I been doing this to myself?

For me I had assumed that everyone can clear their daily email mountain & in tray (including the revolting job!) Meet clients and still have time to be a business ambassador at a local school all before 3.00 in the knowledge that before 9.00 I had played Teacher, done 2 washes, cleared the ironing and still had time to stroll to school in the sun. So that after school I can play with the children, bake cookies and have the energy to cook a nice tea and still read a story at bedtime and learn the rest of Hannah Montana's Hoedown Throwdown & play ball with 'Stupadog' for half an hour. Super Mum? No, of course not, just a very organised person with far too much energy for one human being.

We are very quick to be aware of our faults. For instance I think people see my energy and enthusiasm for everything as annoying and false and so don't believe that I am genuine. But I am learning to appreciate that is not the case.

Its my energy and enthusiasm that is part of me, that makes me unique and wonderful. But assuming that everyone else can achieve the same as you, denies you your skills and abilities.

I was asked to talk to a roomful of over a hundred 15 year olds on a topic relating to the workshop that was being run with as much notice as it takes to unzip my new handbag. I did it, I enjoyed it and it prompted people to come and talk to me.

Easy. But was it?

I know lots of people that I have coached and that I know personally that fear talking to a room full of people more than getting on a plane. Apparently its the forth biggest fear. So I now appreciate that this is not a skill that everyone has. That does not mean to say that everyone could not do it, just that it is a skill that I already possess and that they have not learnt yet.

The other point here is that if you do struggle with a skill you assume that everyone else can already do it. Cold calling for instance - So many people hate it with a passion, they would rather visit the dentist than pick up the phone. Or walking into a roomful of strangers and walking up to someone and saying "Hi." People do stay at home instead of attending. But if you could see a sign over everybody in the rooms head that said what they were really thinking how many would have a sign saying "Let the floor open up and swallow me whole and get me outta here!" And how great would it be to know that you are not alone. How often have you told someone about something that you hate and you have felt a connection to that person because they have told you they feel the same?

So here's an idea for you. What could happen if from now on you acknowledged that you have skills that other people don't have and that things you are not very good at so are lots of other people. And a bonus thought here for you. Just because you are not good at something now it does not mean you can not learn to be good at it. If you are passionate and dedicated you can achieve anything - It's great to remember that.

So I am going to do just that. I will continue to have the energy of a classroom of five year olds I will continue to be interested and enthusiastic about everything, and I will acknowledge that being me is very unique and pretty cool - (and if you personally know me you would definitely say that there is no one quite like Mandie Holgate! I now see that as a great thing and a fantastic U.S.P!)

I hope you too can appreciate your U.S.P and the unique individual you already are.