Women + cameras = Fast moving women in opposite direction.

Any one that knows me knows that I have been wetting myself (not literally thankfully) about a photo shoot I had to do. I am often helping my clients appreciate the importance of making their website, and promotional information personal and unique to them, because this is essential. To really stand out and make people think "mmmm I like her I want to work with her."

Again people that know me, know that I am always saying "people do not buy from businesses they buy from PEOPLE" So you are an important equation in your business success. So I knew that the pictures of me that exist on the world wide web were not the best they could be (unlike me) and something had to be done about it. And as I also say "what ever you want to do the least is the thing you need to do first"

But what is it about women and having their photos taken? A really stunning lady I know told me the other day that her hubby complains that he looks like a single dad in their holiday snaps because she is always behind the camera! How bizarre is that?

And in all in honesty when I booked my photo shoot I went back through our albums and realised that percentagely (yes its a made up word - why not?) I am only in about 10% of the photos. Okay I am no Heidi Klum, but people don't generally run down the streets screaming "aaahhh my eyes, my eyes" after meeting me in the street. In a 1950's style alien attack stylee. So why do I hide behind the camera?

I realised that although I am a confident business woman, maybe my confidence in me is not as great as it could be?

In the past I had coaching to help me build my confidence and it worked. I now have the confidence to walk into a room full of strangers, determined to meet people and get to know them. Confident in the knowledge that I am nice to know and a pleasure to talk to. Not my words but I have open ears to hear the compliments that I didn't have when I lacked self belief and confidence. Yes I get nervous when I stand up in front of a hundred people. I am normally thinking "can they see my heart pumping out of my chest?" but I have the confidence and self belief that they have paid to see me and want to hear what I have to say. So smile, share and enjoy it.

But maybe that confidence has slipped a bit or I have not developed my personal confidence as well as I have my professional confidence. With this in mind I was determined to find the self belief in the person that I look like. A photographer told me that its vanity that stops women having their photo taken. but I disagree. If you don't feel confident in the way you look, the last thing you want is permanent reminders of it.

With these thoughts in my head you can imagine how nervous, and how many trips to the loo I made before my photo shoot. Not forgetting how many times I nearly phoned him. "Sorry I have a spot/broken nail/aversion to bright lights/a prior engagement with the dentist, I can't make it"

I even had an offer to go out on my dad's boat for the day, and since that's my idea of heaven. (So far out to sea, you nearly cant see land, no phones/laptops/jobs/kids/hubby (he gets sea sick on damp grass) I could have been easily tempted.

"But no Mandie" I thought, as I have always said "never ask others to do what you are not prepared to do yourself" So I packed my 4 outfits, with matching jewellery, my props, makeup and hair brush. Buffed, scrubbed, manicured, and preened myself. Acknowledged that for some reason my fringe did not want to sit anywhere near my forehead (for the first time in 35 years!) and got in the car. First step accomplished!

I will not describe what my innards were doing, but needless to say I was not feeling in a relaxed smiley mood when I drove to the photographer. So you know what I did? I coached myself through it. Instead of thinking of the ordeal in front of me. I thought about how I wanted my website to look with my picture on it,and nothing else. I thought about how I wanted to feel when I left and drove home. I pictured a smiley, confident woman happy in the knowledge that her website pictures were fab.

And do you know what? I think (mmmmm I actually stopped typing and thought about this) I enjoyed it. Not at first. At first I felt very self conscious and daft. I hate fuss and this was definitely fuss. But as I relaxed (thanks to a friendly, funny and great photographer) and he showed me the shots and realised the smiles on my face were genuine and I looked .........kinda nice.

And the best bit, is I when I got home I looked in the mirror and I saw a different woman. I couldn't see this grotesque disfigured uuuuggggllly woman. I saw someone with great cheekbones, friendly blue eyes and surprisingly not the biggest nose in the world.

So the photo shoot didn't just give me new pictures to adorn my website, social networking pages and promotional literature, it helped build my self belief. "Hey Mand, you are not the ugliest woman on the planet, you are pretty good looking" So the next time I see a camera, like last week at a networking event where I hid behind the person I was talking to" I will just smile. Heidi Klum I am not, I am Mandie Holgate and its pretty cool!